It’s so hard to see it right
In broad daylight
Why
How many times have I realized
I’m lying
When I’m trying
To be real
To speak clearly
How many lives
Have I
Pulled apart
In my careless want
Of nothing
Will you come to me
With decades bleeding
Between us
Revealing
A wound I inflicted
Without even feeling
The blade in my hand
Am I someone’s monster
Did I harm her
Thinking I had charmed her
Did I break her
Thinking I was making her
Stronger
Am I insane
Do I remain silent
And die in it
A fool that’s been filling his
Own cup
Without looking up
It’s all wrong
The way we are
The way we string
Each other along
Deception
Deflection
Deranged intentions
I am rage incarnate
I am love departed
The gaping hole of loss
The hard abuse of every boss
Of endless disappointment
Endless days of being exploited
By everyone I choose to join with
Take advantage
Place the bandage
Pretend you’re candid
When you planned it
Calculated and deceptive
Motive
Moves you
Forward
Through me
Why do you hate me
Why don’t you stop
When it hurts me
Why do you take
When it breaks me
Why don’t you care?
John Thursday 